Meditation teacher Tara Brach says the mindful witness is the antidote to anxious thoughts. To cultivate it, we have to take a wider view and step outside ourselves.
Aug 28, 2023·edited Aug 28, 2023Liked by Kristi Koeter
First, this is such a cool community we're part of. Seeing Rudy's quote (and Krista's) helped me realize how important our work here is. I'm very motivated continue helping folks, and in this case, it seems like I was able to connect some folks who can help each other with this odd journey we're all on.
Second, I'm embracing this introspection too! I think it's really helpful for me to share the pieces that I can with the reader. It's therapeutic, but it also makes for compelling reason (if done right).
We're building a little tribe, and that has been one of the best parts of being part of this community. And you in particular have been so helpful in bringing together this little mix of writers.
Thanks, Kristi! I've always been sort of a connector, which is strange for an introvert, but I have always seen the value of collaborating with others, especially those you respect and like.
Me neither, but life sort of inserted me into some really uncomfortable spots at various times. I think I found myself able to get over anxiety and apprehension by understanding that the alternative was to work for someone else.
Now, working for someone else can be great! But for me, it was all-important for me to make my own way in the world, and so I did what was necessary... but only barely. Some of those times weren't super fun, but they were probably all places where I was able to attain some level of growth.
Thanks for mentioning the good of crying and my post - and you are a good writer! I totally get these 2 am moments; at least you are wise enough to get up and do something useful like clean the bathroom with the time. I just keep fretting. Doubt is all part of this unfortunately, but makes you better I'm sure!
Kristi, thank you from the bottom of my heart for including me in this amazing list of writers and articles. I wish there was two of me because I want to pour over every one of them with a fine tooth comb.
I totally agree with what you said when you disagreed with me (this makes me think I may not have communicated my point very well in my post🤣)! I believe it IS hard to run away from ourselves by numbing out. I tried that, which is why I had to quit drinking. Like you, I choose a bigger life where I step into the discomfort, no matter what it brings.
Please don't quit writing! There are so many great cheerleaders here on Substack to help you get over the hurdle. I wish I had links I could share right now because it seems like most everyone goes through exactly where you are right now. Your Substack message is vitally important (and as a side note it looks like you've changed the visual aesthetic perhaps. Sorry if I just didn't notice it before but it seems different. I love, love, love it!!)
Thank you, Donna! Your writing is such an inspiration.
I go back and forth about whether we can really run from ourselves. I know a lot of people use drinking or drugs as a means of escaping pain, but I'm not sure how successful they really are. I feel like even when we really try to run, little bits of that pain seep out whether we want it to or not.
We can't run from ourselves. Many people spend their lives trying and possibly those are the ones with regrets at the end. I'm no expert but it seems the only way to find peace is through surrender and the only way to that is through trust, and the only way to that is through a deep inner self knowing.
Thank you so much for your kind words about my writing❤
HI Kristi, I know those 2:38 AM visits, very well. For what it's worth, I've been experimenting with two approaches: identifying the fear, then focusing on solutions. Thinking of the fear as providing information - things I need to consider but not get stuck in and make sure I have covered those bases.
First, this is such a cool community we're part of. Seeing Rudy's quote (and Krista's) helped me realize how important our work here is. I'm very motivated continue helping folks, and in this case, it seems like I was able to connect some folks who can help each other with this odd journey we're all on.
Second, I'm embracing this introspection too! I think it's really helpful for me to share the pieces that I can with the reader. It's therapeutic, but it also makes for compelling reason (if done right).
I think you're figuring this thing out.
We're building a little tribe, and that has been one of the best parts of being part of this community. And you in particular have been so helpful in bringing together this little mix of writers.
Thanks, Kristi! I've always been sort of a connector, which is strange for an introvert, but I have always seen the value of collaborating with others, especially those you respect and like.
I envy people with that skill. It doesn't come naturally to me.
Me neither, but life sort of inserted me into some really uncomfortable spots at various times. I think I found myself able to get over anxiety and apprehension by understanding that the alternative was to work for someone else.
Now, working for someone else can be great! But for me, it was all-important for me to make my own way in the world, and so I did what was necessary... but only barely. Some of those times weren't super fun, but they were probably all places where I was able to attain some level of growth.
Thanks for the shoutout!
Thanks, Rudy!
Thanks for mentioning the good of crying and my post - and you are a good writer! I totally get these 2 am moments; at least you are wise enough to get up and do something useful like clean the bathroom with the time. I just keep fretting. Doubt is all part of this unfortunately, but makes you better I'm sure!
Thank you! I think doubt and questioning is a big part of the journey. Can be a big pain, though. Sleep deprivation isn't easy.
Hang in there! Friends started handing me magnesium lately for sleep!
Kristi, thank you from the bottom of my heart for including me in this amazing list of writers and articles. I wish there was two of me because I want to pour over every one of them with a fine tooth comb.
I totally agree with what you said when you disagreed with me (this makes me think I may not have communicated my point very well in my post🤣)! I believe it IS hard to run away from ourselves by numbing out. I tried that, which is why I had to quit drinking. Like you, I choose a bigger life where I step into the discomfort, no matter what it brings.
Please don't quit writing! There are so many great cheerleaders here on Substack to help you get over the hurdle. I wish I had links I could share right now because it seems like most everyone goes through exactly where you are right now. Your Substack message is vitally important (and as a side note it looks like you've changed the visual aesthetic perhaps. Sorry if I just didn't notice it before but it seems different. I love, love, love it!!)
Thank you, Donna! Your writing is such an inspiration.
I go back and forth about whether we can really run from ourselves. I know a lot of people use drinking or drugs as a means of escaping pain, but I'm not sure how successful they really are. I feel like even when we really try to run, little bits of that pain seep out whether we want it to or not.
We can't run from ourselves. Many people spend their lives trying and possibly those are the ones with regrets at the end. I'm no expert but it seems the only way to find peace is through surrender and the only way to that is through trust, and the only way to that is through a deep inner self knowing.
Thank you so much for your kind words about my writing❤
HI Kristi, I know those 2:38 AM visits, very well. For what it's worth, I've been experimenting with two approaches: identifying the fear, then focusing on solutions. Thinking of the fear as providing information - things I need to consider but not get stuck in and make sure I have covered those bases.
Sounds like you've got a good handle on the mindful witnessing that Tara Brach talks about!