24 Comments
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Shauna WhiskeyChick Castorena's avatar

I started publishing personal essays here. I've been a production blogger in entertainment for 20 years with my income tied to someone else. I *have* to become financially independent while I still have time for a career pivot, so I practice writing here while I ramp up to bigger publishing goals.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

I love this for you. I suspect Substack has played a part in many of our midlife rebellions—it certainly did in mine, helping me find my voice and get more comfortable putting myself out there!

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Denise Mills's avatar

I have no filter and call strangers out quite loudly when they're being douche bags.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

I believe this is both healthy and necessary!

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Shelby Tutty, MHA's avatar

Mine was learning how to accept my body as is and appreciate all that it does for me (neck down lol). Now I want to give it what it needs instead of what I want it to do for me. My attitude has completely shifted. It's not easy some days but I'm working towards it. Great seeing photos of you! I come from a long line of women who died their hair right until the end. I don't know what decision I'll make but I know I'm not ready yet while I'm still going through perimenopause. One major adjustment at a time.

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Andrew Smith's avatar

I'm not sure I've ever really stopped rebelling per se, but I love this topic. Society needs to be rebelled against constantly.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Totally agree. I really like the small subversive acts, because they often lead to embolden the subverter.

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Linn Thorstensson's avatar

I’ll be 44 in February and I still don’t feel like I “belong” to the midlife group. Maybe it’s because I don’t have kids so life hasn’t changed that much?

I’ve also always felt that I never quite fitted into the norms, or followed them.

I stopped coloring my hair almost 4 years ago and I do have a fair bit of grey. That transition has been an interesting one. Next up is leaning into my “midlife” body and I’m embracing those changes with clothes that I like and that are colourful and comfortable 😄

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

It's funny because I probably didn't either at 44. The changes started kicking in at 47, 48, 49 ... I wonder what 50, 51 and 52 are gonna look like. You're one of the models I look to for guidance on body acceptance, so it's surprising to hear you're starting to lean in. I think you've been doing it!

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Linn Thorstensson's avatar

You might be right Kristi. My body has changed a fair bit over the past few years so I have really had to practice what I preach. Buying some new clothes have been a necessity, as some simply didn't fit anymore.

I've had a few wobbles but rigth now I am beginning to feel more at peace with it again. I am curious what this decade of my life might hold.

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Ann Goltz's avatar

I stopped wearing makeup or doing any styling of my hair in my late 30s. 15 years later I'm still comfortably me, in all my glorious frump.

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Karen Anderson's avatar

I became a public school teacher when I was 46. At age 51 I became a widow. And at age 53 I married again. I stopped getting my hair colored when I was 61. I was fortunate that my gray hair has always been sort of woven in with other colors, almost looking like highlights. Growing out my hair was easy for me. I was one of the lucky ones on the going gray journey. Now, at almost 70, I'm enjoying writing. I've had a couple of stories published with Chicken Soup for the Soul. I enjoy writing here on Substack too.

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Wen's avatar

Cutting my hair short as supposed to long, how I wore my hair all my life! Then, I proved to myself I could travel through Europe by myself, and I did.

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Pam Moore's avatar

I love this question! I gave up dieting at 40... At 45 I tried standup comedy for the first time and am now hooked, a year later. And recently- this is small but feels important- I clearly told two people (a friend and an acquaintance) that I'd prefer they not introduce me to anyone in a networking capacity without checking with me first. Sorry I know that's three not one but they all felt kind of bold!

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Woah, that really is bold! Do you mind me asking what was the impetus for the latter?

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Ruth Steggles's avatar

I think I have been rebelling my whole life, but going back to studying as a mature student just for the joybof it was life changing.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

It must be quite liberating to be one of the few “elders.” I’ve thought about going back to school myself, but I also think it might just be another means of procrastinating on the book I’m writing.

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Addie Broyles's avatar

I stopped shaving my legs and underarms a few years ago, and it's been a HUGE relief to feel "done" with that act of performance.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

That’s a good one, Addie, and one I hadn’t considered. Now you’ve planted the seed…

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Ruth Steggles's avatar

Me too!

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Jessica Neighbor's avatar

Yes, going gray has been a rebellious act for me and I love it!

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Audra White's avatar

It took awhile, but ending the marriage, leaving my corporate job and losing 45 kilos in under 9 months with dance and yoga were life changing for me.

Thanks for sharing the transformation photos. I think you look lovely in each.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Thank you, Audra! Sounds like your rebellion was really good for you!

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Nov 20
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Linn Thorstensson's avatar

Love all of this Alison.

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