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Donna McArthur's avatar

I stand with all my sisters when it comes to the pain, discomfort and turbulence caused by menopause but the word I'm going to go with is WISDOM. (Please do not tar and feather me all you gorgeous women!) As challenging as it is, and it damn well is, I think it's also an opportunity for women to show the world their hard earned wisdom that's come with doing all the things we've done to get to this point.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Heck yes, Donna! I totally support this. If we allow it, I believe we can find inner wisdom in this stage of life.

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Lori K's avatar

Fatigue, but I could go on. Thank you for sharing this.

Although I continue to work with different types of remedies to help improve my symptoms, I want society to understand that this is part of a woman’s life cycle. Giving grace to myself and to others is a good start to understanding this. Next… retirement options at the age of menopause with copious amounts of compensation. Lol

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Lori, I totally agree with you. This is part of a woman's life cycle. Part of me, at times, questions whether we should be replacing hormones for this exact reason. But also women in some countries don't experience some of these same symptoms so prevalent in Western societies, which makes me think there is more to it than we fully understand and lifestyle certainly influences these changes. I think giving grace is a great place to start and also understanding that each of us is on our own path, though there is collective overlap in many of our experiences.

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Lori K's avatar

Yes, lifestyle plays a huge part in it for sure!!

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Poetry for sanity's avatar

Unnescessary suffering, while you are expected to go on with Life as usual. But there is no more usual. It’s like a shitty day roulette of alimentära, pains, anxiety, despair, tiredness - insomnia and the odd new surprise

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

You're right. There's no more usual, or rather, it's a new normal. I know there is legislation being created and some workplaces also looking at how to support women through this time in their life, but clearly we have much further to go.

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Prajna O'Hara's avatar

Yes, I am going to say, rest, wisdom, relief, freedom, creativity. I simply did not have the other things and I know they are real. I had premature menopause at 39 due to C-section intervention, a negligent brith of my twins, taken from me at one pound each. My body stopped. I nursed three years but never bled again. It would be hard to sort out the full on survival system of trauma to other aspects of my body life as a woman/mother. Now I am learning to savor rest, realigning with moon cycles, the deep mystery of being a woman in a female body that is not designed to "push."

There are so many important stories here. A topic I am exploring in my Crone years. Thank you for this important exploration!

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Prajna—Wow! Your story is both heartbreaking and inspiring. I can’t begin to imagine the trauma you’ve experienced because of these major life events, but I also see your resilience and determination shining through.

Thank you for bringing your voice into this space. I love how you’re rejecting the idea that we’re supposed to always "push" and instead are focusing on what it means to live in a female body that follows a more intuitive rhythm.

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Andrea Hoffmann's avatar

“We are witnessing a menopause revolution”

Oh, yes. I am so HERE for it.

I’m the one with the bullhorn.

Great piece.

We need to keep talking about this loud and often.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

I love it! We need more women with bullhorns!!

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Lila Sterling's avatar

After a very rough time, made worse by life circumstance; Wisdom, rest, personal power, reclamation, and increasing assuredness. And a beautiful realization that I am of the greatest blessing to the world, when I attend to my own self first.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

YES!!! More of us need to believe this.

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Kathy Napoli's avatar

Womanhood assasin

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Connie Baglia's avatar

Uneventful. My childbearing years were heartbreaking with 7 miscarriages from low hormones and who knows what else. So by the time I hit menopause I barely noticed. My hair has more wave now. Woot! And s*x is more fun not having to worry about birth control :) Great conversation!

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Your comment is so honest and powerful—it speaks to how complex and personal each woman's journey through different life stages can be. I'm so sorry to hear about your heartbreaking experiences with miscarriages; it takes a lot of courage to share that. But I love how you’re celebrating the upsides of this new chapter, the new waves and more enjoyment in intimacy. Thank you for sharing your story and joining the conversation!

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Ruth Steggles's avatar

It seems a long time ago to me now and my memory of it was constantly stripping clothes off and putting them on again. But it invited me to look at my life and I made nutritional changes that have served me well. It is also so great to be out the other side. I feel lucky to be a crone. Send love to anyone suffering in the middle of it 💜

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

There is life on the other side. And I love the idea we can make changes that serve us well without it coming from a place of fear or resistance but desire for wellbeing.

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Nan Tepper's avatar

Freedom.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Yes!! I feel this so much too, Nan, and I am so glad we were able to connect yesterday. It was the highlight of my day.

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Nan Tepper's avatar

It was really fun to talk!

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Linda Miller's avatar

hot

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Nicki's avatar

Hot tired worn out and very dry. And that’s just my vagina.

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Lol. This is my favorite response so far!

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KiKi Walter's avatar

Reinvigorating. I feel SO much better on the other side! The hormones of life before menopause were not my friend. (Loved this post!)

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Thank you. Do you mind me asking how long it took until you felt you were on the other side? I haven't even begun to explore that side of things, but it will be a beautiful day when I feel I'm ready to!

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KiKi Walter's avatar

Hi Kristi (I'm also Kristi IRL!) -- I don't mind you asking, but I don't really have a clear answer. I guess I didn't have some of the classic symptoms when I went through it. It was like -- one day my period finally stopped and the gates of heaven opened. I had struggled with my monthly hormones for so long I have NO idea when menopause started for me. All I know is my cycle ended when I was 50--I'm 54 now. I think because they were SO bad, that's all I needed to feel rejuvenated...just to have that all go away. As far as mind fog and other things go...I can deal with that in comparison! But my migraines went away, the painful periods ended, and my mood swings subsided. I'm a much healthier woman post-menopause. Just my experience--I know others aren't so lucky!

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KiKi Walter's avatar

Except for fatigue. I suffer from a horrific case of chronic fatigue. If that went away, then I'd REALLY be happy!

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Kristi Koeter's avatar

Sounds like it’s been good for you. And nice to meet you, Kristi. My grandmother name (to my children’s animals is Kiki or Mama Kiki)!

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KiKi Walter's avatar

Nice to meet you too! That's funny -- over on Medium, there were a bunch of people who used to call me Mama Ki. You can't tell from my old photo here, but I also embraced the silver. :-)

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Claire Amritavani Brown's avatar

Awful

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Ann Spragens's avatar

Liberation (eventually)

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Blythe Bradshaw Erotica's avatar

Empowering! Just like you, once I had joined up the dots of all my symptoms and got the appropriate HRT I was flying, free of any expectation that I would one day breed, be more beautiful, be more thin...

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