💬 Weekly discussion: Share one insight around food, body or self-acceptance you’ve gained with age
It took me years, but I finally learned I don't have to 'earn' the big holiday meal.
I’ve been thinking about this a lot as Thanksgiving approaches, and a memory popped up for me last week—ironically while mountain biking. I used to have so many rules around eating in general, but holiday eating was next level. Back in my running days, I would intentionally schedule a long run (10 miles or more) on Thanksgiving morning so I could “earn” the right to eat whatever I wanted later in the day. My earliest memory of doing this is from college, but I did some version of the earn-my-meal game well into my mid-40s until I found intuitive eating.
These days, Thanksgiving (and holiday eating) looks a lot different for me. I have no shame around what I eat, and because of that, ironically, I’m less likely to overindulge. If I go for a hike or a mountain bike ride on the big day, it’s for the joy of it and because it makes my body feel good.
This year, we’ll be having an over-the-top dinner prepared by my daughter, a trained chef who lives out of state and doesn’t get to visit often. While I don't know the full menu yet, her mac-and-cheese is amazing and the top request by everyone in the family. If she makes it, I will be indulging guilt-free—no extra calorie burn required!
It took years to let go of the rules and just savor the experience, but the rewards have been worth it—less guilt and shame, more joy. And because I've given myself full permission, I'm much less likely to overindulge. (Even if I do, I won't be beating myself up over it.)
Now it’s your turn.
If you could share one insight about food, body image, or self-acceptance that you’ve gained with age, what would it be?
How has your thinking evolved over time?
Share your nuggets of wisdom and insight. You never know what might help someone else!
I learned to let go of the obsession around not wasting food that my mother and grandparents instilled in me. The food is going into the trash either way. It does not need to pass through my body first. It's OK to throw away the food I'm finished with and there's no need to have a clean plate when I'm done eating. (childhood food trauma extraordinaire!)
I have had so many rules over the years, mostly hidden in the guise of 'healthy' eating and kidding myself, that I was completely happy with how I was. The fact that I thought about food constantly didn't strike me as strange. Your letters have encouraged me to explore intuitive eating. I eat everything I fancy now when I fancy it. I don't get off on being hungry. I am still learning not to worry about the impact it may or may not have on my weight, but I am appreciating my body daily. Thank you for all you share.